I haven’t even started writing the post for today and I can already feel how weird it’s going to be. I don’t know how to start this. I also don’t even know how to feel about putting this facet of my life out there like that.
I guess we can start with the good thing.
I started a new job today as a cash admin at a big store in the city. It is a full-time role with all the benefits I want/need right now, and it’s in an area of operations that is pretty new to me. I dubbed it in my mind as a “skillsmaxxing” job with a lot of whimsy in it. I also love and appreciate how my leadership team is very much chill in the sense that they acknowledge that our job isn’t that serious and that everything is fixable/very, very few things are detrimental. Which is very reassuring.
On the other side of things…
For context: I am an astrology girlie and regularly read and listen to my astrology readings on the Chani app. Today, my reading said that there would be a relationship pattern/dynamic/issue that will begin to surface.
There is someone I’ve been talking to for a few months, and we had developed a mutual liking for one another. Something had been triggering my anxiety with regard to where we stood, and after going back and forth about bringing it up, I decided to rip the Band-Aid off. The last thing I wanted to do was build potential resentment. Plus, we’ve been really good about communicating in general; it’s been the most communicative romantic-adjacent relationship I’ve ever had.
And while we did have a very honest conversation, I can tell things are about to end and I am grieving that. I am grieving the end of a beautiful chapter with someone who I have come to really care for. I have no regrets about starting that conversation. I know in the past I would not have done that, and would just rot in my own anxiety. So for that, I am proud of myself.
But it doesn’t take away this sadness.
And who knows…maybe this isn’t the end. Maybe it is just an issue. But…I don’t know. I’m mad that the reading for today was pretty on point and I have a bone to pick with all the planets in Aries and Venus in Scorpio/Venus about to go into retrograde.